after a few more beers I realized that both my wife and I like Latin men.
there's nothing like watching the sun rise at the library alone on a friday morning to make you want to kill yourself.
Relationship's official after skype sex--college kid at his finest.
He was singing Will Smith Just the Two of Us to his burrito. That high.
He was singing Justin Beiber while we did it. I love secure Spanish men
From what I hear, her blowjob factory was runninng at full capacity this weekend.
Then you shook your fists at the sky and explained to us that losing a sneeze is like losing an orgasm
I'm currently eating a turkey dinner, listening to xplosive by dr. Dre, and drinking rum. Hispanic christmas dinners are the best.
Honestly and this might sound scary... But I want to get high and play with weapons
She said she is going to be sex-slave version of Princess Leia for halloween. You think there is any way I could pull off an attractive Jabba suit?
At least your nickname is not Plunge Slut and that nickname is not in a published thesis work
At one point in the night, as we were running from the cops, I clearly remember you yelling "little gnomes are tickling the insides of my body!" ...that high.
Dear sober self, your keys are on the table in front of you the only way your typing this is with autocorrect goodnight love you
also. when i get a car, the amount of space there is for sex WILL be a huge deciding factor.
Like at first he was barely doing anything. So I was like harder and then holy shit he's like going all HULK SMASH on my vagina. I mean it felt fucking awesome. BUT STILL
Randomize
