Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
Spotted on freeway- girl in ford focus takes a hit from a 7 inch pipe while knee driving. She winked at me. I want her life.
So you started off by saying "no homo," but patting his crotch and saying his jeans fit him wonderfully may have overshadowed that.
Well he's not a stripper, so we're already doing better than my last date.
Someone just took a shot from my crotch. I should not have to drive home
you were stumbling down richmond carrying a girl in a nurse costume. its not even halloween dude
He refused to pierce my nipples, saying they are the best he's ever seen and that blemishing them would be a crime
You also thought the cure to hiccups was drowning yourself (and you were right)
Note to self: don't try to shave your legs when sex-sore. You CANT reach, stop trying.
holy shit the woman im hooking up with is closer to my moms age than my own
Who put the fucking tampon in my Mike's hard lemonade?
the fact that you trapped hornets in a mailing tube to put in his mailbox does not surprise me sadly.
He's teaching me French for free and I'm giving him blowjobs. Win-win.
He is 6'5, went to a Christian school and he's a violinist....I'm going to fuck the jesus right out of him.
She lured me back to her place with pizza and tits. I was totally helpless
Randomize
