Is it weird that I have contacts who i've classified as DO NOT ANSWER?
Lol no its called college
You're the only chick there. That's not an orgy, that's called a gang bang...
Your brother just informed me that half a mouthful is a unit of measurement. I love talking to members of your family.
She saved the condom from the first time we did it.
just peed in the tub. didnt notice the passed out drunk guys there until a minute in
Just spent a extra 20 minutes on the phone with the lady from unemployment talking about how to make the best brownies.
He talks to me in this sweet I know you might be pregnant voice.
I want a picture of impoverished children wearing Oregon national champions shirts.
Yes, I feel sorry for the tribe that gets those. They won't be able to hide from the lions.
I'll report later on the progress of the mountain orgy
I passed out in all my clothes. like my purse too..and with a cup of water next to me..and my last tweet last night was "Bye."
Who gives a hand job to a 19 yr old one night then the next lets a 31 year old random man fly a plane to town and pick u up and take u to dinner?
the fact that i came three times was completely negated by the fact that he high-fived himself after.
*goes to show prof a picture* *forgets tit pic is in camera roll*
I don't want a big night. But I am okay if we wake up in a penthouse at Crown Casino.
Enjoy your early 30’s! You’re still young enough to catch a twenty something that can fuck 4 times a day, hot enough to date forty year old penises that can last long enough to give you multiple orgasms
Randomize
