I couldn't deal, she's a vegetarian. Every woman should like a little meat in their mouths.
dude you have to find out what a girl's name is before you sleep with her. if her name is debbie she's boring, if her name is lauren she's an overrated hoebag, if her name is meagan she gived bad head.
This can't be good. I've realized that I weigh less in the morning after I have had a blackout drunk night than when I work out and eat healthy.
I queefed so loud it echoed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just saw 30+ dicks. Explain later.
I dont think he was a real cab driver. I think he was just a creepy guy with a van.
Oh and probably wearing a life jacket instead of clothes didn't help things either
Then she cat effected the picture of my dick I sent her the other night. I'm in love.
He puked in the voicemail. That's a true friend right there.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
also new logic of mine : I fuck a Scottish kid , Scotland national animal is a Unicorn airgo I've come close to fucking a unicorns descendent, mother always said dreams come true
dude ur drinkin a beer not ta capri sun. lose the straw
My arms in a cast, how am I supposed to have sex with only one hand?
more importantly I need two hands to eat pie
Also I think I set a new personal record. Definitely slept with him less than 45 minutes after meeting him. Oh god my life.
Making friends with the guy who had alcohol-infused whipped cream was the best decision I made all night.
LACE UP YOUR GODDAMN SHOES
N O
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