she was so not down for the gang bang
you have to be so drunk to ignore a taser
Hey everyone. This evenings celebration will commence with a cocktail hour at genghis at 830 to be followed with an upscale dining experience at taco bell at 10. All are welcome. This is not a joke. Thank you
Just found out my 21st birthday is on a Wednesday. The possibilities are cheap, as well as endless.
My parents just out drank me... I cant get back to college soon enough
I hereby state that I am over the age of 18. If I am not of age to purchase or consume alcohol products, I hereby acknowledge that I have not received any alcohol products from said party host. Also, in the event of injury or death, said party host is not to be held accountable. Please reply with your full name and today's date for your e-signature". *note: no text, no entry.*
Sorry bro, just a precaution. You know, ever since the "Jake incident". What a douche.
What sexual position says im sorry for your loss?
You said you wanted to start a restaurant called 'Barbecue' where everything is barbecued. You sounded really proud of your concept.
I just made my roommate a 'Hope you don't have chlamydia' cake.
Make one for john too.
That dog was the best thing i ever touched
I can't tell if I'm getting better at doing my online spanish hw drunk or if my teacher is just grading on creativity. Either way that senoritas gettin an applebees gift card when i graduate.
Hey, if a dude can't randomly belt out Whitney Houston tunes from time to time, is life really worth living??
Well, I turned down sex again. This is guy #5 in the past 2 weeks. My vagina is going to seek emancipation.
A drunk frat boy just jumped on the hood of my car while I was driving down Bridge St. He yelled at me to keep going since he was playing frogger and needed another car to jump on... or a log. I hate this town.
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
Randomize
