Do u have any bacon or vodka by chance
Thank God for loud music. There is a circus in my butt right now.
Dude go to the top of pikes peak right now to catch Kevin Bacon's band performing
The bacon? Yeah right. What if there's Tremors?
Him and Burt have already taken care of that. It's a once in a lifetime chance to catch the Bacon brothers live in concert. I sort of have a boner
i was unsuccessful, further solidifying for me that girls should not masturbate.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It wasn't a wasted relationship. I got road-head in an Escalade. I still keep that with me.
we banged on the home plate. i wasnt even aware of the significance of where we were until afterwards hahaha
Well, I'm eating cake, watching wedding videos of people I don't know, and crying. Clearly I'm a vision of mental health today
We are taking shots for every green Lon-Capa box we get for the homework.
He's covered in dirt and enchiladas. We're going drinking now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If I ever die and svu has to come to my murder scene make sure they know I don't wear underwear always so it might not be as bad as they think
if you just come over, i will entertain you
arguing about the color of your bong does not count as entertainment
I apparently made a "health and fitness" subcatagory called "drugs" on mint at some point. I used it to catagorize all of my nyc atm withdrawls for $60 haha
My dad found me naked curled up under a towel on the couch with a fucking tub of butter and a spoon. Ambien Mondays are dead
But seriously. What possible excuse could I come up with to ditch my parents on Christmas to go fuck him?
I'm just trying to win a butt plug dude
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