What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
call of duty 2 was the straight man's twilight
Taking the airport shuttle drunk should not happen this often in my life.
Ok I can't be your drugdealer AND booty call AND friend. It just doesn't work that way
it was really awkward..i thought he had two dicks, but later realized it was jsut his roommate
I'm riding in a wheelchair, being pulled by a golf cart. You need to be here.
walking around pouring bird seed on passed out guys in the quad.
It was almost as bad as the time I peed on the floor of the Pentagon's subway station.
Dude. Once again. Cleaning house. Found weed I hid from myself a month ago. Celebrating/testing it out. if i dont text back in 10, call dominos.
You thanked your mom for the gymnastic lessons so you could do a keg stand
I think I accidentally invented a religion.
I went home with him again and he LEFT HIS OWN HOUSE at 2 in the morning while I was IN THE BATHROOM.
I dunno that I'd be trusting enough of junkyard tequila to drink it.
hurry there's a jack Daniels slip n slide and clothes are coming off faster than I can even comprehend oh thank god for autocorrect
I just met his mom for the first time with a hang over. Then we went to watch his 8 year old cousin get baptized. Apparently his family loves me. I should drink more often.
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