thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
Bea Arthur died! :(
What?
Big bird passed.
Too bad my thesis topic isn't "defining a hot mess: a study in drinking, smoking and other bad life decisions."
Spent the entire ride home from downtown trying to convince designated dawgs to drop us off at waffle house instead of our apartment. i told them it was my house...they didn't buy it.
Yeah? Well I'm currently predrinking downstairs in my room by myself. Absolut and water with a hint of mint because I'm using the glass I keep my toothbrush in. Fuck, you bitches better get off work soon.
I feel like the devil slapped me in the face with his dick.
Birthday success
So last night I taught an old homeless dude to respond to "Blue" so I could shout your my boy Blue at the party
Hypothetically how does one go about throwing away a dildo?
some dude just accurately guessed my height and bra size.. that is cup AND inches around. creepy, yet impressive
He sent me nudes and then a text asking if I tried the new Cantina Bowl from Taco Bell. He sure does romance right, doesn't he?
Maybe if I get to know him I'll stop wanting to fuck his wife so much.
I will feed you tacos. I will touch your butt. Happy Valentine's Day ❤️
how early is too early to start drinking over the gilmore girls revival
I want to meet people. Preferably ones with penises
They got skeletons in the booths to enforce social distancing.
Thought they were weekend at berniesing that shit at first.
Randomize
