Every time there's an awkward silence a gay baby is born
K got coke dick during a threesome with two strippers. Say no to drugs.
Whoa! I think of you when I eat cottage cheese.
He just asked me if I ever had the urge to put a zucchini in my ass.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
slowly transforming into a stationary lump of steel. how can you tell me that was JUST weed
Well I pulled a muscle in my leg dancing in the tanning booth drunk at 1 pm soooo there's that
There's a treasure map on your stomach. Treasure may or may not be the clothes you lost...enjoy
Oh my Christ. I just came so hard my penis stood back up and took a bow afterwards. I need Thai food.
It's not an office Christmas party until your boss confesses his undying love for your boyfriend...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There was just a girl standing next to me on the train, wasted, wearing only one shoe. I so wanted to pat her on the shoulder and say "oh honey, we've all been there"
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
Dude she tried to bite my face off last night, literally. I have never actually felt like a piece of meat until that point in life...
I should not be allowed to be in possession of a fifth and a phone at the same time.
just threw up in a gas staton parking lot in front of a father and son. stared them in the eyes and finished like a boss
I would totally suck a dick for some poutine right now
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