What happened to our ballroom dancing plans
her nipple to breast ratio was just odd
we black-lighted her bedspread and it looked like a jackson pollock painting.
you asked the guy at 7-11 if he remembered when you came in and threw news paper every where... then you did it again
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she made a facebook for her toddler.. his likes include lil wayne and ice luge. He has more friends than i do. I mean, Seriously? there's not enough booze in the world to make thanksgiveing bearable
He wants me to have his first child. So that makes four gay men that've called dibs on my eggs.
You called my nipples compassionate. What does that even mean?
My vag is like the Sahara
Ew that's gross.
The sad truth. Barren and empty.
Is there some sort of line being crossed when your shower activities start to involve jimmy johns?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Talking to a customer about getting high and staring at glow in the dark wheels while there is a cop in the store. Just another day in Tampa
Currently rolling a blunt in the bathroom of Planned Parenthood
Dude I bought tampons with cardboard applicators by accident and now I know my vagina hates the 1960s
Please don't give away my fajitas
I was so drunk, he put me to bed and went down stairs to hang out with his friends. Apparently, I was curled up in the closet, spooning the dresser when he came back up.
I could see the visible disappointment when she saw my penis
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