the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
remember when mike pissed in his pants and then put a double cheeburger in the pocketsss of said wet pants for "safe keeping"? yea drunker then that.
i don't know where i am. i made bad decisions. i think this guy is dead.
i crashed through a building. if that counts then yes, i went out with a bang.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Btw...pregnancy boobs are amazing. I don't recommend pregnancy in general but the boobs are good.
Exactly. So he deserves crazy "thanks for keeping me out of jail" sex. Or an "I'm glad your excessive cocaine habit had some positive outcomes" blowjob.
I had to make out with him. He bought me a few drinks and he was an Angels fan. As a Yankee fan that was my way of saying good game and sorry we beat the shit out of you
Finishing last nights 1.5L of wine and beef jerky for breakfast. Work looms, ever the prickly bitch.
You're the third person who's asked me for an afternoon blow connection in one day. Unreal.
That's more of a you-issue than a me-issue
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My condoms might be a little big for you but hey, a big sweater is better than no sweater at all when it's cold right?
My bad man. I was at a strip club, and apparently it's like a big deal to take your phone out in one of those places.
Correction: Jimmy johns. The one pita pit employee has been an asshole to me ever since you locked them out of the store
Can I get my morals surgically removed?
Do I have to cook for the potluck? Can I just bring a costco size bottle of Vodka?
I just volunteered myself to get tazed this should get interesting
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