You can bone my sister, but I will end our friendship if you write 'LOLERS' one more time at the end of your texts.
like i told you yesterday: virgins, blood, my name. do it.
You know, sometimes I seriously doubt your commitment to sparkle motion.
If she didn't want me to pass out in her bathroom, then she shouldn't have such a furry rug in there
New dating criteria: what kind of ex will this person be?
I told him that he could only go home with me if he didn't talk or tell me his name
I'm in the grocery store cradling a box of wine like it's my firstborn, so of course this would be the first and only time I've ever seen my boss outside of the office.
I told him he wasn't aloud to one word text me. Unless that one word was threesome
Seriously, webMD this shit for me, I cant move and I dont wanna die until I have something worth fighting over in my will
I just told my mother my "if there are drugs I'm only taking them if I don't have to pay" rule and witnessed her perception of my shatter and crumble behind her eyes.
I was hoping for a marriage proposal... Or at least an offer to sleep in his bed.
Giiiirl. Just had a BM that almost killed me.
I don't know if apple cider everclear was such a good idea
Sorry about the confusion with the nudes last night that was rude
Is she still on a quest to lick every stranger that enters the bar, or have the restraining orders reached critical mass?
Randomize
