i kept saying "bloody hell" in a ron weasley accent until i forcibly told myself to shut up
How was last night?
She looked like Delta Burke in her fat Designing Women days ... and she just left like 2 minutes ago. Right after breakfast.
she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
I thought it couldn't get worse until she said "Nipple hair"
There is only so much cookie dough and masturbating I can handle in one night.
he was drinking cheap vodka with warm tap water and a packet of crystal light. if that's not an alcoholic then idk what is
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
his dad came out and found me sleeping indian style on the couch with my cup balancing on my boobs. didn't spill a drop.
You just want to fuck a girl in a dinosaur costume, don't you?
Its only 9:11 and I just somersaulted through a window. Its gonna be a good night
Phone sex soon? I mean date. Sex date. Date phone.
all 3? possibly?
I think I'm up to the challenge.
I set up her keyboard so that no matter what she does, it will open up RedTube. Click and command Q all you like, its going to porn. No I play the waiting game
I fucked him while wearing his hat. I love the navy
Update: I spent 10 minutes trying to fish out a rogue vagina weight.
If I could figure out how to do him with his wranglers on you would never see me again.
Randomize
