Sometimes I think its so cool that a dick that has been inside kate moss has also been inside me. So exciting.
You're perfectly engineered for doggy style
So i think we're being coned into a threesome with the promise of pokemon
he's mad because you were 'slandering his penis'.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we tried to pick out bridesmaid dresses with pockets so we could sneak flasks in with us. what the fuck is the point of a dry wedding?
He had me saved in his phone as "Dick Socket". Lets see if I ever fuck him in a bathroom again.
The next time i black out make sure i remove the ping pong balls from my weave. Especially before my first day of classes.
I sent him a bunch of texts telling him that his beard wasn't long enough yet so we couldn't fuck and to text me back in a few hours if it had.
It's all fun and games until some random starts jerking it on the deck.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Wow it must be so difficult to be as popular as you are and smoke as much weed as you do
Well you ended up trying to convince two Greek girls that you were Greek, but failed massively by shouting at them in Spanish, and then almost vomiting after taking way too much snuff. Maybe lay off the guinness next time?
Btw when I was saying "fuck you" I meant it like "be quiet beautiful princess"
Are you awake? I feel like I need to confess my sins to someone not on this side of the country.
I WILL KICK YOU IN THE FUCKING THROAT IF YOU EAT MY FUCKING ICE CREAM.
You are now at the point where people no longer question whether or not you might be on drugs. They now know for certain that you are
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