Three words: puerto rican gang bang
It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
Awkward medical moment of the day: A very obese girl with a disorder that literally makes her hit herself punched herself in the face. Literally. While screaming 'MCDONALDS MONEY'. Right. Beside. Me.
Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
so i woke up in some guy's bed but then i realized i can atone for this tomorrow
The night ended with a lot of tears and everyone singing along to Willenium
New discovery: conditioner is better for jerking off than baby oil. Fuck yes.
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
Now there's vomit covered trash all over the front lawn. I feel accomplished
Because if the best sex I've ever had was with a gay guy, then God help me.
What I love about college? The kid tripping balls has a kayak made readily available to him on any given Wednesday, Saturday, or Sunday.
Just saw some dude tumble down the stairs of the bar while leaving...fist pump...and then sprint down the road
Some guy was coming onto me last night and in the middle of it all he said: 'It literally says this on my birth certificate: Francis Coburt: The Guy Who Can Pull Two Beers Outta His Pants Like Magic.'
I can tell right now that knowing you will either be really fun or ruin my life
whose shirt was i wearing?
his little sister's
what was she wearing
a feather boa and 6 inch heels
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