I know...I feel like disliking her as a person on facebook
Dude someone is playing the piano in the other room while I shit and it's making it really peaceful
Jessi just used the excuse "it's not you it's me" to get out of getting a lap dance.
as we waited for a manager to come open the door that we broke while having sex on the wall, we decided to go round two in the hallway before he came back.. god i love hotels.
drunk enough to drink jager bombs out of a bowl on the kitchen floor.
Can I interview you during sex or would that be weird?
You'd think the neighbors would be used to grown men coming into my house drunk at 230 am.
A drank guy in the ER just sang Trouble to me and when he sang 'Lying on the cold hard ground' he threw himself onto the ground and landed on the wrist he'd just broken. Thirsty Thursday is weird already and it's not even 5.
Thats why you dont have a "jubilant gunfire celebration"
I WOULD NEVER LIE ABOUT SOMETHING AS SERIOUS AS SABADO GIGANTE BEING CANCELED
He walked in wearing nothing but a WWF belt and yelled "THE CHAMP... IS... HEEERE!!!"
Jesus tap dancing Christ rock out with your cock out is supposed to be just an expression. And even if it weren't no one wants pics bro.
The hat, the beard, the hard posing - like who does he think he is?
A bag of dicks
That's dating life
My liver has officially said "fuck this shit" and escaped from my body.
I admire the fact that you replicated my apartment on the roof but I would appreciate it more if you would move all my stuff off the roof and back into my apartment.
Randomize
