At the hair cuttery. A father here with his daughter just answered his phone "ken's whorehouse"...Now I remember why I used to pay more for haircuts.
i learned a valuable lesson last night. sometimes nice girls finish first. twice.
its 4th on my favorites list. 1. butt sex 2. mini skirts 3. three meat pizza rolls 4. fuck the pain away by peaches
his extensive knowledge of the age of consent laws kinda scares me....
Do you want the something i can tell my mom in ten year version or the you're gonna call me a whore but be proud version?
I mean, we do coke and have sex occasionally...I wouldn't call that a relationship.
I find it worrying that she bit me in bed. Then proceeded to write her name in bite marks. All without ever losing the rhythm of our fucking.
Nearly got hit by a blue bell ice cream truck. Can I count on you to make plenty of puns like "her life was sweet, and so was her death" at my funeral if that was to happen?
You're the reason I lose Never Have I Ever
I bought new panties to console myself ... you know, because I am going to lose my ovaries. Well, if I don't die of a heart attack first. But at least when the EMS folks find me, I'll be finely dressed from the waist down.
I'm sorry that throwing up fish and Jamaican Rum in the back of your dad's car ruined our friendship
I mean I only got hit in the ass with ONE firework
I offer naked tickle fights and orgasms and you call it trouble. I call that Christmas.
One sec I was having the time of my life, the next I was shitting water
Last night I ate a candle out of a strippers ass.... I guess it was an okay night.
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