she came over and started getting naked and said its not like i came over to just hang out
youve hit the jackpot
Theres this fat girl in desperate need of the proactive factory in my class and as i watch her shovel food in her face I am struggling to not only keep down my meager lunch but also to stay straight. Eliza Dushku couldnt even get my flacid dick to move
Ohh the wonderful, yet disgusting things she can do with her hair
last nights makeup is better than no makeup at all.
What I lack in compassion I make up for in lack of compassion
my drunk uncle just explained that turkeys are not gentle lovers... and no context doesn't make it better.
She had to get her inhaler in the middle of fucking...but she kept it in.
So I woke up today with someone's door knob in my pocket. I hope everbody else got out of the house ok.
your mascara is on the toilet seat from when you fell asleep last night
I didn't budget in chasers this month so were chasing everything with water. Sorry.
I told my mom about how you got white girl wasted and sobbed about Whitney Houston. She sends her condolences.
tell her thanks so much
Sex-sore abs and my workout pants have gravel stains on the knees. It's like the workout of shame.
We went to Denny's and he threatened to fight an entire high school track team by himself
I felt like I was selling my soul to satan but then I realized I already pawned it for drug money
OH MY GOD YOU GUYS I JUST FOUND OUT I HAD PHONE SEX THE OTHER NIGHT
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