i'm signing you up for texting rehab
I just got hit by a car. I'm fine; I'll be to the bars in about 15
Someone will be leaving this trip either pregnant or devastated.
that's not even the weird part though. he already knew where the bathroom was, he might have been here before..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Listening to my boss get blown in the next room by a male bartender from the gay bar. And watching pawnstars. Tell me I'm not the best wingman ever.
I can't believe they didnt cut us off after we all hugged each other and started singing "were the 3 best friends that anybody could have" RIGHT IN FRONT of the bar and bartender...
The blackout version of me left a ransom note to the sober self. Somebody needs to control that guy
I'm eating my emotions. I am no longer interested in anybody other than my own hand and vagina.
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey my vagina is like a company. Everyone has an equal opportunity....
strip vodka pong is never a good idea. I saw into his colon when he picked up the ball off the floor
At the end of the night i was really thirsty and tied to a bedpost
Suffice to say, I think if people ask about your bruises, and you look them right in the eye, and say "they're from fucking...", people would be like, "respect."
Everclear isn't food dammit
So, I actually said the words "but face tattoos are sexy"
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