She's JV to your varsity
I'm half single.
Please tell me it's the bottom half.
I'm drinking while my friends build sand castles, now I know how my dad used to feel
I got my half for the rent already.I called the cops on the drug dealer neighbor and got a 500 bucks as a reward
Just caught my bro jerking off to a lane Bryant catalog
my little sister told my dad she found willy wonka's golden ticket in the backseat of my car. now my dad knows my boyfriend uses magnums.
Ian has mac and cheese all in his bed/on the wall. Either you did it or he fell asleep with a bowl in his hand and spasmed in his sleep.
Cooked or uncooked?
I can't finish this paper in my room because every time I get distracted I start masterbating. I think it's time to go to the library...
Goodbye hot boy in my geo class...goodbye my lover, goodbye my friend. you have been the one, you have been the reason I came to claassss
I feel as though the word "tired" has become synonymous with "too high to manage the stairs" lately
Turns out, his fucking is as lame and staggered as his NFL career.
Their engagement party consisted of them doing shots, yelling at each other, leaving for 30 minutes, and coming back with smiles.
I'd say they're off to a great start!
Zach, it's Lisa from work. Was that you yeiling BALLS DEEP at me on I-25 or is it just something about me that invites that from rando creeps?
Why is it I can't go buy redbull and tylenol pm from a store without getting questions about my health choices?
We kept having to tell you that you couldn't just sit wherever you wanted at Walmart. Sitting in the middle of the raw meat section was unacceptable and children were staring at you.
Randomize
