hey can i ask you a kinda weird question?
i know what the question is. yes they are bigger, and no i did not get plastic surgery
I would pay so much money for a video of you fucking a sheep
Taking a shot for every status related to the patriots losing. Hello hospital.
I'm already mentally preparing myself for the fact that I'll probably be sleeping next to a toilet.
I don't think he wanted to hear that my most serious relationship was my 1 1/2 year fuck buddy... I think he figured out that's where he's heading
I'm trying to convey to the smoking hot Spanish cleaning lady at work that I want to bone her but I think it's getting lost in translation. How do you say "blowjob" in Spanish?
Ran out of plates, so I'm using my sociology notes. Looks like they will finally have a practical use.
three guys with a tattoo of the Walmart rollback smiley holding up a middle finger on their ass=free drinks in every bar
Honestly you'd think more guys would be happy to date a cute female dealer, but apparently something about safety or whatever
Because making bad decisions is what makes our house great and I don't plan on changing that anytime soon.
When he was going down on me I referred to him as "Lord Snow" and HE GOT IT. HE GOT THE GAME OF THRONES REFERENCE. I AM IN LOVE
I can't wait til me and pit bull can just be together
He wants to buy us a microwave. Clearly the man is going to fix my life.
Thanks a lot dude. I'm grateful to you for your gift of pure piss.
someone commented on last weekends photos impressed that so many homeless people wanted to take pictures with us. weird that those "homeless people" are our friends... right?
Randomize
