white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
You were so drunk that you were trying to take pictures of a MILF at the park so you could send them to Adam, but you didn't want to "seem creepy," so you used taking pictures of her son as a cover. Needless to say, cops were called.
We had a long talk in which he told me he respects me more than any other girl. 30 minutes later, I got a facial.
I already have one guy that I have regrettable sex with. I don't need another.
I'm gonna make a therapist very happy and very wealthy this semester.
I've had to much cheese to give a fuck about anything. im tired.
The strip clubs here are like a safari of penis, and I'm gonna bag me a rhino.
The best part about this city is obvious. Someone saw me crouching by a bar pissing in my leftover Panera bread bowl and they just winked.
WHAT KIND OF SELF RESPECTING 28 YEAR OLD WOMAN WAKES UP IN A FRAT HOUSE?!?'
The cougar kind?
Uh do you have my pants because I have yours
I feel like a sex bomb and I need to go explode on somebody
My lighter is stuck in my beard.
Take off your clothes and see if he wants to have sex, that's a good way to find out
sober me is the one who makes bad decisions every boyfriend I've ever had I met sober
The candles are lit, the magic circle is drawn, now all we need to do is get naked and see how many orgasms we can manage.
Randomize
