I'm in a room alone pouting because I got the wrong nachos at taco bell.
i don't remember her name, but i don't need it unless we decide to hook up again. but even then, i can get away with not knowing it for a while. it's not like we have actual conversations.
If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
and now I know what throwing up pineapple chunks is like.
Yeah, we had those soaking in vodka for like 36 hours
outstanding.
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tried unsuccessfully for 10 minutes to do bong hits while wearing glow in the dark vampire fangs before realizing air was getting out of the sides of my mouth
In an m&m suit playing manhunt drunk. And you thought you werent guna have a good time
I'm not upset because i like you. I'm upset because I can't use you for the sex anymore.
I came in your room, you looked at me and said "I fucked up" and then some kid showed up and took you to the hospital
Long story short he broke into a preschool and threw all their cones into a tree.
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If you're mature enough to fuck him you're mature enough to tell him you don't want a relationship come on
i'm not saying you're gay. i'm just saying all my gay friends think you have a great ass.
Waking up at a teachers house is a very confusing thing
I thought it was improvement but then i realized sex isn't an emotion and I hate everyone
I didn't think this needed to be said, but our sexts are an emoji free zone
Was cussing out our DD when one of the strippers takes him backstage. WTF
They call him magic hands is all I know.
Somethings are best left a mystery
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