Yes, I fucked her, no she wasn't that loose, yes she caused more drama than a 14 year old girl
We drank a $4 handle of tequila until 5 am. Please think about that.
On the bright side, at least we arent the generation raised by fucked up teen moms.
Apparently I have a urinal in my bedroom
I tried. Now my legs are bleeding and I cracked my head on the coffee table. Never taking your advice again.
I just woke up in his house on his bathroom floor with an IV in my arm.
Nope. If I'm going to drive an hour to fuck a teacher, it will NOT be missionary thats for damn sure.
I woke up at 3am, my head in a toilet, still at the kegger, wearing a random cowboy hat.
It got heated then she just left and I was all alone in the women's restroom.
Come now. I'm bloody but I'll give you the best fuck of your life.
I think we might have a drinking problem when the ASU kids called us crazy
No one made them take a shot with us at the 12 hour mark. That's their bad
He kept saying "Welcome to Indianapolis" over and over while we were having sex...because that's his hometown. I was scared and confused... I didn't know if I should have said thank you or what.
I know! It's like he knows when my vagina wants to misbehave!
He eats kale on the regular. Do I look like a bitch that wants to eat kale. No. Give me some Boston market.
Wait... where the hell did you even find a live OCTOPUS, let alone green eggs and ham?
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