nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
She woke up 3 seperate times, each time she had a look of pure terror on her face, she had no clue where she was.
The bartender laughed but the manager kicked me out when the mom conplained. There's no way my fart harmed that baby in any way
Seriously how many times do I have to sleep with him before he stops calling me dude
i think you may have a shot to cock block in a moment. just saying.
Wake up an cock block please bc these are noises i dont ever want to hear again
He told me his cum shot melted the paint on his bedroom wall and asked if I want to see it
I don't think it's food poisoning, I think it's cause you cooked it over burning styrofoam
Is it weird that i want a guy to ask me to homecoming by spelling it out in meatballs?
THATS VERY WEIRD
I had a dream he was standing in front of me naked and flexing while yelling VICTORY and gizzing all over the floor.
Best ethics paper a stoner could write. I called my professor Dr. Superfly Arandia. And I'm pretty sure I used "respect the hustle" somewhere in there too.
You called me into the kitchen so you could show me that you were peeing in the kitchen sink and then told me to leave bc you couldn't do it with me watching
I woke up and sent him a text that said 'I'm sorry forever'
should we try and roll a cross joint since its good friday? you know, for jesus
I literally woke up walked into the bathroom, threw up and died this morning. Then went to my 8am.
Intoxication Level: I'm as graceful and flawless as a fucking dinosaur.
Randomize
