Her body is shaped like a coke bottle...a two liter coke bottle
my head feels like I tried to put alcohol out of business last night
No one goes out in public like that, unless they do anal
the pizza man had no reaction when jackie and me opened the door naked, i guess he's used to that shit
i caught the condom in my mouth.. dont ask me how
my boss made my mugshot into an 'employee of the month' poster.
this is not okay. even my mom refers to me as a sorostitute.
I know. I know. The man who pulled me from my mother's womb was the same man who had his fingers in my vagina today. My life is a joke. I don't know how to feel about this.
eating jello out of the cup. with my face. while on the toilet. i am at my lowest.
I think it's gonna be hard to find a guy that won't take my consistent drinking as alcoholism
I definitely think you should enjoy one last spring break being a sorostitute before you get serious and settle down with price charming. I mean hes not going to be there any way. he can wait a week.
one more hour of this work bullshit and I'm off to get high with your cat.
Have you had sex with a man from New Zealand? No? Then your input is invalid.
If you have been drunk at one point during the day and are going to bed sober that same day, something is very wrong.
Put the lady boner away. He's engaged. To my brother. No, life is not fair.
Randomize
