i wore my purity necklace wen we fucked. but its ok cuz simplified was blasting in the background
hahahaha. im glad listening to simplified justifies breaking ur promise to god
And then she said we stopped for a train and i tried crawling out the back window.. again, i dont remember this.
your like the ambassador to my penis.
You better wipe the dick of your lips before you come smoke this blunt.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She asked me to go inside, make myself a drink and slip into something a little more naked.
He broke hus nose arm jousting with the traffic cones... We need to make head shots illegal or get helmets or something
I bet it kind of sucks while you do community service I'm getting blown in the shower. haha
I was only out of town for 1 week. His cell records show he texted 63 ex-gfs and hookups while I was gone. And 10 condoms are missing.
He has a lot of emotional energy invested in your vagina.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
A talk about Arizona woman's rights politics has never turned to sex so quickly before.
That's how I like my men: traumatized and crying in a ball
STOP SETTING ME UP WITH GUYS YOU MEET ON CRAIGSLIST
Just used the "Buddy" Poppy flower I got from a veteran to clean my one hitter. "I'm proud to be an American"
I just saw a woman give her infant whiskey tits. About ten minutes ago she was doing shots, and now she's breast feeding. Whiskey. Tits.
I have betrayed my no carb ways & I can feel it.
Embrace it. Come over to the dark side. I'll feed you muffins while stroking your hair.
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