yeah i just made her a character on oregon trail and i hope she gets dysentry and dies. that'll show her.
ugh. people who use coupons make me wanna punch a baby.
I can only imagine the horrible things my future wife is doing on spring break right now.
You wrote me a letter and I cannot make out anything you wrote except the last sentence which says "tell the wolf ill meet him at sunset and that I'm sorrry"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
when you wake up try not to move. we are betting to see if more sprinkles stuck to you or the pong table.
I think I may have walked up to her while she was with her friends and asked for a "do over".
If I drank a glass of water for every drink I had I'd die of water intoxication like some tweaked out looser at a rave
Someone explain why I'm twerking in my bathroom right now before a charity run
I'm sorry I keep drunk texting your boyfriend sports updates.
That's okay. He needs friends too.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I screamed "You look like a guy I've fucked!" to your brother at a party... I have some explaining to do.
So your telling me I can lick your ass but you CAN'T spend my money
You don’t need a wing man if you have a solid hook up on the pumpkin pie
I tried to fuck you in my bathroom while my parents were in the next room. I am a clusterfuck of fun.
woke up to two girls crawling on top of me forcefeeding me bacon. Best. Hangover. Ever.
I'm seriously scared right now. Woke up next to 3 geese and a lot of feathers ..
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