I mean, he's dancing back and forth between pathetically sad and massively fucking creepy.
you kept trying to convince me i had aids because my head hurt
Ok love is a little strong. But he consented to Nachos, beer and board game date with my cats. Keeper.
To be honest I don't know what's worse, the fact that I interupted their shower sex or the fact that I was so drunk I used the adjoining stall anyway
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i slept with him so i could steal the screens out of his sink faucets for my bowl when he went to sleep. not because he's funny.
I promise a much better performance tomorrow than last night my penis has a bed time
she bonged a coffee cause she was hungover. then she bonged a beer cause she got ambitious. then she barfed. then she had to start over again.
At 27 it's no longer called 'slutty', it's called having a healthy sex life...
How do I know if porn I have watched is haunted?
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Are you setting a date to bone me?
Are you accepting?
one more hour of this work bullshit and I'm off to get high with your cat.
And at the semi-adult age of 25 I have shit my pants. Not even drunk, just really late to work. Is this real life?
Woke up with a pineapple again... where do i keep on getting these ??
are you inviting me to ice cream?
the subtext of everything i say to you is inviting you to ice cream
operation Bang Australian Boy = oh so successful
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