I like how you refer to peeing in the car as "super cute"
Haha so you are never gonna want to meet my mom now...she just found your thong in her front seat
Found out that no one else got Christmas bonuses...and you said nothing good could come from sleeping with my boss.
You just begged me to mute the porn and watch her ass bounce while listening to dubstep the whole time.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All the girls at the party had American flag thongs on... Pretty impressed with coordination seeing as how impromptu this event was
We legitimately thought something was wrong with you until someone pointed out you were just doing the thriller dance
2000 dollars has been put in for bail money. Also we're signing contracts
Double vision is so hot when a big dick is in sight. Thank you Bud Light.
You were holding up a boot and yelling boot gang
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
maybe her throwing up on me was a foreshadowing of how she would later metaphorically throw up on my life
We joked about how funny it would be if he got pulled over with 300 breakfast burritos in hus car. We walk outside of the school just as the police lights turn on and pull him over
In tonight's episode of Travis' Fucked up Sex Life, Travis breaks into a building at Tulane to have sex with an attractive Asian man.
Well let me fuck you while I make potatoes. It's every girls dream
Im goin to jail bro ill talk to u sun
i’m blowing bubbles in my bloody mary so yeah it’s pretty much time to go
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