I'm just looking at Lindsay Lohan's vagina.
Oh yea! I was just doing that too!
so i decided not to tell her that her fiance is cheating since i already bought the bridesmaid dess
My vagina is so ashamed right now. It won't even look at me.
I've banged too many servicemen's wives to still be considered an American.
in fingerprint form on my ass. Seriously not cool. \ni bruiiiseeee like a delicate fruiiiitttt. Heeeaaarrr the rythymmm
Technically he's married but he says it's "not like that" even tho his wife lives with him. Not sure if I believe him but I'm sleeping with him anyway.
From time to time I think I'm happy for a second and then I remember how a guy stopped me from giving him head on my birthday weekend.
I feel as if we moved beyond the hook up stage when she blew me as I drunkenly finished my chicken nuggets.
Sex obviously provides more sustenance than oatmeal.
You don't understand. My ass is the color of eggplant.
On another note; I'm three days away from being 1/12th of my way from not having sex for a year. I need to get laid.
We broke the bed while I was handcuffed to the headboard and let's just say that was a hard one to explain to the RA
I just found a samari sword in the couch. I'm about to take like 5 shots and pretend to be captain jack sparrow
Well I just masturbated while reading a recipe for Alfredo sauce so I guess you could say I’m growing up
Rich men love me! I remind them of their trophy wife!!!
Randomize
