Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
You know your from las vegas when the girl on the stage in the strip club was in my US gov class senior year
I have come to the conclusion that if you don't fulfill your life ambitions you should go into porn
I'm doing shots of crown out of a baby bottle. My friends are sensational parents.
For future reference, never invite the people you met at Dunkin Donuts at 2am to your house to watch Dogma
No, I'm in the bathroom trying to scrub off the 16 tally marks on my wrist so its not so obviously to the world that I puked on a couch last night.
We just ended up getting drunk and doing field sobriety tests on each for practice... No one remembers who passed.
You did this to me with your delicious pizza and moonshine.
I'll forgive you once we're drunk again by noon.
Also, I imagined that his bacne was bubblewrap and that made it much more tolerable
I left my pipe in my center console with a bowl packed when I took my car to the shop, and when I picked it up the weed had been smoked, but my oil change was only half price.
I'm keeping track of how many times I've said "Shhh, act like you're not naked." in my life. So far, 3 times.
I've decided to take one for the team and bang the landlady for lower rent.
My tinder date had to be home by 8:30 cause she's on house arrest.
I'm supposed to be at work in 10 min, I just woke up and am 45 min away...tinder for the win
Randomize
