If last night was a website it would be called poordecisions.com OR uncircumcisedspanishweiner.org
my cat ate my toast this morning while i was getting dressed. i can already tell today is going to suck.
She had a baby and now works at Hooters. She is the poster child for peaking in high school.
There is a newly found video on my phone of me following you to the bathroom to watch you throw up. sorry I didn't hold your hair
I hope your lack of response means you're banging, not talking about her purity ring.
Did you mean to cry when you finished last night? Or were you just that drunk?
She kept throwing quarters at him and yelling "Goooaaallll!!" whilst taking her clothes off one by one. I'd say she had a good night
He just grabbed my boob and justified it by saying "I just wanna feel your heart beat"
Someone sharpied "COCK HUNGRY" on my butt cheeks last night. When the fuck did I have my ass out?
sometimes it's just necessary to be your own gyno when you're too afraid to tell your mom about your real life
The struggle bus crashed, rolled down a mountain, and went on fire, and I was on it ugh.
I was standing in my mom's kitchen in only my neon green thong, eating pizza over the garbage can, and sobbing while he was yelling at me.
My boyfriend told me that I said I wanted to "feast on her vagina"... Glad I don't remember.
He set the tone in the back of his car by blasting Marvin Gaye's sexual healing before railing me
just took a pregnancy test before I went out drinking. if that's not drinking responsibly Idk what is.
Randomize
