i wonder if detective benson from law and order takes those handcuffs home. i bet she does.
yeah he didnt know till after their one year. You have no idea how bad i wanna say "dude i sucked on those boobs before you"
She wore that goddamn strap-on all night. When she was playing guitar hero it kept getting in the way but she just wouldn't take it off.
Now he's trying to use the tornado warnings as an excuse to get head. Yeah, b/c THAT'S the last taste I want in my mouth b4 I die...
wanna tell me why theres a glass of water stuffed with tamptons in the freezer?
I just had my first boner in 64 days today....glad to find out my fluids are still pumpin
Im the proud new owner of the campus speed bump sign
My phone autocorrected your name to "grownup." that couldn't be more inaccurate. I'm getting a new phone.
He tried to convince me that it wasn't really that small and all he had to do was pull back the groin fat. It was still small.
Drinking a bawls. If I'm dead when you get home, yes, they are poisoned.
And if you ever tell anyone that I have emotions ill kill you
I need to see you idiots before I go back to school. But we shouldn't snort Crown Royal this time.
Just tried to do a line with a snorkel I cut off... that is how my Aruba trip is going!
The guy next to me on the bus has one hole in his jeans that has over 20 mini dicks drawn on his leg. Classic.
last night someone said that theyd like to do drugs with a dolphin ... judging from the diagram on the wall we figured it out.
all we need now is a dolphin ... and some drugs.
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