Everything smells like syrup. But I guess that's better than last time when everything smelled like beer.
Aside from the fact that there's a penis in my mouth, that's a pretty good picture of me
A burger king employee called me from your phone while you were on their bathroom floorl. Hope ur not in jail....4 realz
I'm covered in sharpie and the girl next to me just said something smells like fried food. Hint: it's me. Why am I in class?
I cartwheeled across every street... They tried to stop me but I bit anyone who came near me
Apparently he crashed because 3 different girls were trying to give him road head at the same time.
STD scares really help you understand the whole six degrees of separation thing...
Target doesn't accept your signature for your credit card if you draw a dick on the pad. Even of your name is Richard.
Sounds like sex on a twister board.
An idea that is both hilarious and intriguing...
Pretty sure I'm going to hell because of our friendship
Last one there wins
I went through his pics. Will you go with me to get tested?
My favorite part was screaming to all my life by kc and jojo and just horribly failing
According to the boxer briefs I found on the couch when I got home, I take it your date went well??
These flip flops mean I'm casual, but I'm here to fuck.
remember when we said that thing when we met about how we were each glad we weren’t furries
ok listen,
Randomize
