i just looked up and i was like omg ballsack and then i didnt know what to do
his roommates stood outside the locked door reading bible verses to us the whole time...
I love having hate sex.
don't worry about the poodle she's always like that. she's like 14 years old and ate a bag of weed when she was a puppy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i could totally date him if i was just drunk the whole relationship
Because you know it would be fucking amazing to get trashed and shatter the dreams of 12 year old girls. I might get a shirt.
you were crying and trying to give advice to people.. that's was a new level of drunk for you
Oh my god, I am the best RA ever. I'm teaching my freshman girls how to deep throat on bananas as a group bonding activity. I'm making the religious ones eat them for potassium.
I love your family. Oh. And on a completely unrelated note, I know where we can steal a dog.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
People said that when they tried to talk to me I answered that there was a glass around my head stopping me from answering them
He is asleep with his dick hanging out of my my little pony pajamas. I am required to wake this man up by blowjob
Your sexual fantasies often terrify me but get a pic
I think god invented us with two hands so we can grab an ass and spank it at the same time.
I just watched a porn called gay of thrones and I think I've reached a new low in my life
It's 8 in the morning and you're doing coke and drinking margaritas. First, you have a problem. Second, why didn't you invite me?
Considering I drank for you last night, do you mind picking up your half of the hangover
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