Is there a "Plan B" app for my iphone?
Halloween 2010: the NuvaRing girls. You're Thursday. We'll walk into the party chanting "Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday, Everydaaay".
My chemistry professor just asked me if I ever found a ride home from the bar last Saturday
She's trying to master eating with her feet. She said it was be she "always has to be prepared."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just peed in a urinal with another girl. It's that kind of night.
I don't care if I just threw up. You kiss me now. This is marriage.
I might come over. Something about you makes me matronly and I have this urge to nurse you back to health with soup and a blowjob
eta to your mouth 5 minutes
lesson learned.. dressing up like a naughty teacher doesn't mean you can get away with spanking a cop with a ruler for being "fresh" with you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Drunk yoga at 11 am turned into me sitting on the couch making fun of the girl in the instructional video. By the way, what the fuck is a third eye?
C'mon pople!!! THursday afternoon isnot gonna drinkin itself!!!
I tried to smoke out of half a banana, and lit my nose hair on fire. So I feel like that sums up my life pretty well.
He wanted to watch the vow, cuddle, and not have sex. An upgrade is in order.
It's all fun and games until you rupture a testicle
Drunk me commented on almost all of her pictures. My favorite one is titled "be as the sea". My comment is "cold, rough, large and letting anyone come inside you. you accomplished." Guessing I'm not invited to the party anymore.
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