I can’t believe the potential orgy I left behind at Waffle House.
So I thought I was doing pretty good and then I sneezed and prematurely ejaculated...
i have it on good authority that she is not as good at giving head as she claims she is
seriously i just wanna be friends
pass
some how when im high sleep beats hunger...its like how paper beats rock it doesnt make any fucking sense but it still happens
My teachers should feel privileged to see me this morning, after the amount of alcohol I consumed last night.
i gave him the "yep, i was your girfriend's collegiate lesbian sex story" head nod
and my attempt at hiding my drunkness from my parents included walking into the wall as soon as they let me into the house.
The police woke me up so they had no choice but to see my morning wood.
yeah the cable guy is coming and everybody is hiding all the pieces in the house. we are up to thirty two. like a fun game of smokable scavener hunt.
Does Jim keep sending you pics of him in drag too???? If so, are you also slightly uncomfortable?
Can't tell if its the LSD or if that demon man just stared at my penis. Cleveland is a weird place. All true stories.
It's entirely possible that I'm fucking yet another gay guy
You know youre getting old when you I.D. the person trying to take you home to be sure they're over 25. Help me.
I can't go to Fassler and not immediately think about you licking a guys wife's butthole in the family restroom
Randomize
