nothing says happy birthday like half a tampon wrapped in someone else's hair on your shoulder.
Note to self: soco dudes get amusinly uncomfotable when I moan at the urinal.
She made a list of the things each of us had done wrong and assigned a point system. Guess who came out the loser?
You stole her bday cake and shared it with drunk strangers on the street.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
went for icecream. accidentally deepthroated it. my mom gave me a dirty look, but the kid behind the counter looked impressed
Just so you know swallowing does not help chest colds. Your Phd can suck my dick
It was a legit night tell he threw a snowball in the bar, thats when I knew it was time to go to the next bar.
I don't know what I would do if cheese never existed
Someone's stooooned
Passed out drunk in a tanning bed...
Did At The Beach call the fire department to get you like last time?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I either have a razor blade lodged in my throat or I've been drinking entirely too much Evan Williams.
Where did you go?
I'm not really sure. They have flavored vodka. I like it and I'm never leaving. Ever.
She had a belly button piercing in the shape of a cross. Talk about mixed messages.
He was so energetic. It was like screwing a bunny.
Dude, you got arrested for trying to direct traffic with your dick....
The expiration date on my 40 is the same day as my 21st birthday
Randomize