Fuck?...well quicky, i have to study...unless you can read my book while i bang you, then it can last four chapters
I can be that talented
the women in the ladies room did not appreciate my innovation of turning a sink into a urinal
Just heard the garage door open and I immediately sprinted to the laptop to erase history, even though I haven't watched porn today...I believe Pavlov now.
how come everytime i call mom shes doing tequila shots
He also has a monumental penis. It's unbelieveable. I'm sorry but he's perfect.
Try and take me seriously and don't look directly at my hair or the jizz on my pants.
He was like a foghorn with a huge penis.
You're really doing everyone a disservice by wearing pants all the time.
I'm gonna take off my shirt and spin it around my head like petey Pablo so u can find us
Can't we have real sex instead of you just thrusting the air near me?
Holy shit, add "successfully got stoned secretly at a party where a cop was" to my list of accomplishments.
99% of the contents of my handbag are ketchup packets and condoms. I feel that says a lot about me as a person.
i spent my Thursday drinking before noon and not wearing pants
Not bad. Ran into Carlo. He shared a story about a sailor who got gonorrhea in his eye. It made me feel better about myself.
Showed up to pick her up in my boxers. Lets just say im 2 for 2 with this new idea
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