Just mADE A PArabola og urine
so i wake up and the chick who i had sex last night left her phone number. next to the number was a broken condom. should i call?
Bc when the owner of your local gay bar and a drag king ask you to take them to a rival gay bar 2hrs away at 4 in the morning YOU GO.
And now I have fucked a local celebrity so double free drinks at bars.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like I got run over by a bus full of inebriated Scotsmen on the way to a soccer riot.
Im currently watching two girls making out. In the library. Hope your studying is going as good as mine is. Haha
But for real, I had the best sex of my life on that bunk bed
He said we would have a beautiful daughter together. That way too much for a one night stand...
I'm done being drunk I wish I could snap my fingers and be sober
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Honestly the prospect of dick really lifts a girl's spirits
Tell him that his phone is taped to the dog's stomach. Stop trying to call it because it makes him scared.
I'm going to force her to break up with me this week. Tonight I plan to shit the bed. If that doesn't work I'm not sure what's next.
u better not lose ur virginity to a sugar daddy who doesn’t post a pic of himself to tinder
God does not give you boobs that amazing to not share them with your friends
Accidentally mixed my gin with cold brew coffee instead of cranberry juice. It’s bad. But I’ll finish it. Never leave a fallen soldier.
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