If you were a Panda and I were a Koala and we had a baby, it'd be a falafel. Just think about that.
Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
Don't interrupt me, I have a limited time to be high and thus be remarkably good at Pac Man
I can mark tailgating, going to the game and getting road head off my to do list today
Is it weird I want to fuck the cartoon chick from e-surance??
Just found out my mom's voicemail password is 6969..
its sad im about to start saving up for how drunk i need to be for the holidays
Wow it must be so difficult to be as popular as you are and smoke as much weed as you do
At least Shia Labeouf would encourage me to do this drinking contest
And you are going to be so turned on by my batman skills later
Drunk you decided to patrol campus as the Arrow and tell random bystanders "YOU HAVE FAILED THIS CAMPUS." Campus P.D. did not join your crusade.
That explains the nerd bow & arrow...
There was one thing about my NYC trip I forgot to tell you: I took a dump in Trump Tower
You wouldn't happen to know why there's an inflatable monkey riding a mattress on my roof would you?
His dick is curly. It's adorable.
I really hope this is just a phase, because I am not capable of carrying both of our drunken whore asses through life. Too much dead weight....
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