One of my boys faked an orgasm while fucking a girl tonite, w/ out wearing a condom mind you.
She caught him, and immediately put her clothes on and left.
WHY DOES GOD HATE MY DICK
we were making out and he got up to change his pants. I wonder what would happen if i took my shirt off.
I passed out and woke up with my pockets full of Lucky Charms cereal and chocolate coins. Another successful St Pattys Day.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it's like a replay of two fridays ago...except not in a motel and i'm not having sex in the shower.
maybe next time you'll take an ex boyfriend warning you that she's batshit crazy as a warning instead of a challenge
It wasn't the stripper that gave you the hickey but I just figured out who did
I just remembered that last night I ate nachos off of someone else's table with a stranger
Batteries died. I don't care that you're studying for the bar. Come over. Bring the law books and study after. I'll even make coffee.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I took a sleeping pill while he was in the bathroom. Time for a game of how long can we bang before I fall asleep.
You are both horrible and amazing
My new years resolution is going to be to stop drunk snapchatting old hook ups asking them when we're going to bang again
Like what? And no, shrooms cannot be party favors.
Somebody broke the sliding door, and someone ripped the toilet seat off the toilet. So yeah, pretty typical friday night
theres a girl in the library eating whip cream out of a starbucks cup... only whip cream, im way to high for this shit
I just found a live peacock hanging out behind the bar. I coerced it into my car and now I have a peacock bro that lives with me.
Randomize