she pooped in my shower. pooped. woke me up and said she thought she farted but it wasnt a fart i went back 2 sleep and found it hours later. no longer hooking up w chicks my moms age.
why do all the strippers look like they came from fraggle rock
Just did the walk of shame across state lines...milestone?
you threw up in the oven last night. i found that out after i preheated it to cook a pizza.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think any school that has COCKS written on it's baseball hats has their priorities straight.
I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
They were fighting, but then they bumped into the bong and it shattered. After that they just hugged and cried.
Potato salad is not cupcake ingredient
Just replaced the batteries in my vibrator without turning on the lights. I need to get laid.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I didn't ask to see his penis, it was an ambush. Impressive though
Remember when we were coked out at that house and we were trying to meditate in the bathroom? Who's house were we at?
but there's so much I wanna do before I have kids. like die
Just text him and be like do you want this pussy or not. You have three seconds to respond.
Apparently I was drunk enough to call he police station and ask if there was a problem with me.
Married dude I had an affair with 10yrs ago was at table next to us at dinner last nite. My mom asked him to take a pic of us & then commented how cute he was as they left. Do I tell her he’s got a huge D too?
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