I like bacon cheeseburgers and the pussycat dolls
Does that mean you want me to loosen up your buttons at carls jr?
I plan on using my big titties for evil tonight.
can you come get me at the bar
ill be there in 10 min
can we stop off at build a bear on the way home
they started playing Don't Stop Believin' and you had a melt down because it wasnt the Glee version
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
can't wait for January to be Over so I don't have to see all the fat resolutionists working out.
How long is it safe to eat only Hot Pockets and Popsicles?
I officially lit my glove on fire while lighting the bong. Winter needs to end.
It is unclear if my flaming esophagus is hangover induced.
Pounded a bottle of Moscato in my underwear while watching Pretty Little Liars...am I really gonna be 30 next year?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's official. Those are now your come fuck me flipflops
Surprise court date day!!! Wake the fuck up!
Sitting on the toilet ... Eatin pizza with one hand, petting my cat with the other. I love a sad drunken life
My condom drawer is now filled with W-2s and tax return documents. Is this adulting?
1st date with cop went weird. He yelled at me & we had a horrible date. Walking to the car I tripped & started bleeding & then he made out with me. Is it wrong that I want to see him again?
THIS IS WHY YOU NEED THERAPY!
we are currently pregaming for our walk to the liquor store.
step one: admitting you have a problem. complete.
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