so last night was fun and all.. but you might want to get tested
I just found out the FDA voted to ban Vicodin, my last connection to this world has been destroyed
you were convinced that if all her tampons were gone her period would stop, so you started eating them.
Just wondering why in an apartment full of stoners there is half a waffle in the TRASH CAN. get ur shit together man
she texted him the burrito order while she was puking in the Del Taco parking lot...
Got hit on at a funeral service by cougar. I think I just got Reverse Will Ferrell'd.
I found them on a couch next to the sidewalk screaming at cars with a megaphone. Kevin chased the mailman with a jello shot.
So in Aca Taco on grad night 1am, this bitch walks in alone drunk as fuck in her gown to the front of the line and says, "I graduated today...thank YOU"
Imagine getting smashed in the dick by a basketball. A basketball made of metal. With spikes. That's pretty much what his dick looked like.
The number of males in the usa getting circumsized are decreasing. Keep this in mind when we become cougars
Out of everyone here, the sober one caught the cat on fire.
I've entered the world of uncircumcised penises. It's disgusting.
his first act of 2015 was getting stabbed
You showed up at 4 am holding a beer and wearing a wig you apparently found in the dumpster.
That explains some things...
Remember the Giant sandworm from the movie Dune? Well that's about how big his dick is. No bulshit.
Randomize
