I am at The Loft in SoNo, and there are two girls within arms reach that are making out with each other AGGRESIVELY. Like I can see 100% of a boob
For future reference, this is Trevors little sisters phone now. Trevs number is 484 XXX XXXX. Great story tho
I'm convinced her vagina is similar to chernobyl, but I want to visit it for the novelty value anyway.
The world would have a new energy source if someone would just take a blacklight to the backseat of that slut's car
i remember introducing him to all my posters and making him be extra nice to frank sinatra and bob dylan before he fucked me
You should know me better than that. I don't whore around. I promise this is a blowjobs only kind of trip.
You told her to step on the scale because you had whiskey goggles, and scales don't lie.
Just heard the words 'Pussy Riot' on NPR...I almost crashed my car.
So what's today's forecast for the female rollercoaster you've been riding?
It's probably because the lack of alcohol in your stomach. Alcohol kills bacteria. I am a doctor. Trust me
God, you're amazing. I just want to hang out with you in the nude and watch Monty Python movies whilst we quip about how comedians just aren't as funny anymore.
Credit for originality. Points off for a mild to moderate creepy factor.
Still at home. Videotaping hamsters.
If a raisin and a desert had a bastard child that would be the inside of my mouth right now
You can't have your cake and publicly stick your dick in it too
To be clear you just said "I'll give you a baby" as a sext?
Pretty sure this radio station is run by a cult. Good thing it's in Spanish, can't brainwash someone who can't understand you.
Randomize
