Tell your sister I'm no fool. Or at least romanticize the notion of the fool.
HOLY SHIT! Did you see the dick on that Great White Shark?!?!?!
she burped and cried multiple times. it was like i was getting head from a baby.
When we ran out of red solo cups we switched to Starbucks cups for beer pong... Who doesn't want to live in Seattle?
I want to fuck you on the side of the bed tonight.
babe, don't say it like that!
I'm sorry, I want to penetrate you on the edge of our sleeping quarters this evening.
did u get his digits?
yes his name is chazbangbangbang according to my phone...
Would it be in bad taste to ask Marky Mark to sign the vibrator I named after him?
My name in their phones is "That Girl". If i can't get it to go away, I might as well live up to it.
I wanna get shitfaced and yell about Tim tebow
I just spent a pre-4th of july celebration riding in a raft being towed by a car through a town that I've never heard of handing out flyers for a river rafting company that I never knew existed. Good night.
SURVIVAL MODE. WE CAN DO THIS. Celebratory survived-working-christmas-retail sex to follow
I woke up the other day with my Google browser open to "DIY lip injections"... I also just received a vial of hyaluronic acid and a package of TB syringes from amazon. I'm down.
I will have no part of this.
That's a lot of people she's fucked in one picture.
All the movies on cable here are either porn or Bollywood. I am never leaving this hotel.
SPICY FOODS AND BLOWJOBS DON'T MIX.
YOU SAID YOU'D TRY ANYTHING ONCE YOU LIAR
Randomize
