I tried karate at age 7 and quit after realizing it conflicted with watching new episodes of "Full House."
This Casey James character from American Idol is really gonna mess up my sex life.
Or maybe the fact that you know who Casey James is will be what messes up your sex life.
in hindsight, $10 Malibu buckets were a terrible idea...
you were watching the nanny crying, saying I wish I was that thin eating twinkies. THAT DRUNK.
Just to be safe, you should be prepared to jump out of a second story window
Just had lapdance from stripper that had her 5th kid 28 hours earlier. A for work ethic.
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
Kings cup with teenagers tonight
Done deal
Saw the same Luigi I hooked up with last Halloween. Still in his same Luigi costume and scruff that hurt my face
I'm currently sitting beside my brother who is taking a bath and feeding him nachos while he covers his genitals. If that's not sibling bonding then I don't know what is
I was on etsy and I'm like those boobs look way too familiar
PSA- Wearing assless chaps results in embarrassingly painful sunburn
He invites me over for to adderall and chill. Academic Tuesday
Yesterday I febreezed my bed in between gentleman callers
Then you got drunk and shit in her car. Nothing before that matters. She isn’t calling you back.
Randomize
