why is it that everyone in pennsylvannia gets fucking prego??
There are fucking limits. Jerking another guy off in the bar toes the line.
They play video games, go on acid trips, and in times of need, are willing to donate plasma together. COUPLE OF THE YEAR.
I NEED to see if his girl has a sister.
this speak and spell drinking game will be the death of us all.
i want to pour hot gravy all over you in bed
Almost to work. And still feel hungover. Like my body is trying to regenerate after dying. Full on zombie shit. But like, one of those zombies from warm bodies that comes back to life slowly.
I think that thing where I have 2 boyfriends is happening again
The whorange rubbed off. His white shirt was so gross at the end of the night I told him to frame it.
Text me all the things you want us to do this summer. So far, I have Kegstand written down
I can't believe you didn't come out. There was a duckling ON THE BAR!
She had an asthma attack and had to stop but insisted on getting me off. It's official she's the one
WHEN JENDA BENDA THE DRAG QUEEN TELLS YOU TO RUN, YOU RUN, BITCH!!!
You came out in nothing but lingerie and a Jedi robe claiming you needed more of those baby hot dog things or you were gonna go all Sith on us
coming down from speed on a 5 hour flight home from vegas is not a valid reason for calling off work the next day
so i said i had a yeast infection
YOU CANT JUST BLOW GUYS BC THEY’RE NICE TO YOU LEXI
I CAN IF I WANT TO
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