when im bored during the day i often think, what do people who dont get high do with their day.. i came to the conlcusion that everyone must be getting high
woke up rolled in a yoga mat listening to enya. I'm never going back to Oregon ever again.
I cant wait for your democrat phase to be over.
His hands were made for my vagina.
i'm pretty sure they aren't charging me for that window i broke with a turkey sandwich while i was hammered.
Im drunk with people I love less than you. fix it.
Just spiked the bong with a ludens cough drop with hopes it soothes my throat after i rip it.
He's tweaking out . If he's on fucking bathsalts and eats my face like a chalupa pull the plug. I don't want to live with no fucking face. Pull. The. Plug.
I'm gonna call it the Reunion Tour. Hooked up with two different ex girlfriends in one day...
How bad is it I'm looking at his cock while waiting to see my therapist?
Just fyi there is a naked girl somewhere in your house. I woke up and she was gone, definitely left her clothes tho
I would go a lot of places to get laid. But I would NOT go to Staten Island.
We have to do it Saturday and get a thirty. If i remember correctly it takes me 12 beers to become a wizard
Some nights you just end up digging your mcdouble out of the trash and eating it. it happens.
He stopped me mid-blow job to say that his new year's resolution was to stop hooking up. MID FUCKING BLOW JOB.
Randomize
